3 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Setting New Year’s Resolutions

Every December, we get bombarded with the same messages: “New Year, New You.” “Time to burn off the holiday cookies.” “This is the year you finally get it together.”

But here’s the truth no one talks about…you don’t need a new you. You just need to reconnect with the real you. The one who’s been doing her best all year. The one who’s made progress that maybe didn’t show up on a scale, but absolutely showed up in her life.

Before you write another list of resolutions that feel more like punishment than purpose, hit pause. Reflect. Ask yourself these three powerful questions first.

1. What Actually Worked for Me This Year?

Let’s start here, because most people skip it.
We’re trained to focus on what went wrong, what we didn’t do, what we didn’t finish, what we didn’t become. But if you never stop to notice what did go right, you’ll miss your best clues for growth.

Think back over the year.

• What choices made your life easier or more joyful?

• When did you feel proud of yourself, even if no one else noticed?

• Which habits, big or small, made you feel stronger, calmer, or more capable?

Maybe you started parking farther away to get extra steps. Maybe you learned to say “no” without apologizing. Maybe you finally asked for help when you needed it.

Those are victories.
Those moments are your foundation, not something to fix, but something to build on.

When you identify what already works, your goals for the New Year become sustainable, not stressful. You’re not reinventing yourself; you’re reinforcing what’s good.

Reflection Challenge: Write down three things you did this year that made your life better. Think about physically, emotionally, or mentally. Then underline the one you’re most proud of. That’s your starting point for 2026.

2. Why Do I Want This Goal? (And Is It Really My Goal?)

This one’s huge.

So many New Year’s resolutions are built on outside pressure.
We chase goals we think we should want. The smaller body, the stricter routine, the busier calendar. But those goals rarely last, because they’re rooted in comparison, not connection.

Ask yourself:

• Is this goal something that aligns with who I am, or who I think I need to be?

• Will achieving it make my life richer or just different?

• Does this come from joy or from shame?

When your goals are born from self-respect, not self-criticism, everything changes.

For example:

• “I want to lose weight” becomes “I want to move more easily and feel confident in my body.”

• “I need to be more disciplined” becomes “I want to have routines that make me feel stable and calm.”

• “I need to stop being lazy” becomes “I want to give my energy to things that matter.”

See the difference? One approach is fueled by guilt. The other is guided by purpose.
When your why comes from something real, like being able to travel, play with grandkids, or wake up with less pain, motivation becomes natural. You’re not chasing approval; you’re pursuing freedom.

Reflection Challenge: Take one of your goals and ask “why” five times. By the fifth “why,” you’ll uncover the real reason you want it, and that’s the part worth fighting for.

3. What’s One Small Change I Can Start With Today?

Big resolutions sound exciting on January 1st…until life gets messy again.
That’s why the key to lasting change isn’t a massive overhaul. It’s small, consistent, meaningful steps.

Forget the 90-day challenges or color-coded planners. Focus on one small, repeatable thing that moves you closer to your goal.

Examples:

• Want to get stronger? Start with a 5-minute stretch before your morning coffee.

• Want to manage stress better? Spend two minutes breathing before checking your phone.

• Want to eat healthier? Add a vegetable to one meal a day instead of cutting everything “bad” out.

• Want to be more organized? Pick one corner, one drawer, or one task, not the whole house. (this is one I struggle with a lot!)

Progress doesn’t come from overhauling your life overnight. It comes from small decisions repeated often enough that they become part of who you are.

And when you approach your goals with patience instead of punishment, your success becomes inevitable.

Reflection Challenge: Write down one simple thing you can do today that would make tomorrow a little easier. Then do it. Don’t wait for motivation, build momentum.

The Real Goal: Progress Over Perfection

Here’s the part no one tells you:
You don’t have to prove your worth with resolutions. You don’t need a “new” body, a “new” mindset, or a “new” life. You just need to honor where you are and take steps toward where you want to be.

Resolutions fail when they’re rooted in pressure.
But when they’re rooted in purpose, compassion, and self-respect they turn into habits that actually last.

So, this December, skip the shame-filled goal setting and start with reflection. Ask yourself these three questions, write down your answers, and use them as your personal roadmap for the New Year.

You’re not starting over, you’re leveling up.

Every experience you’ve had this year, the wins, the losses, the “I’ll try again tomorrow” moments, has been teaching you something.

You’ve built strength in ways you might not have noticed. You’ve learned what drains you and what restores you. You’ve discovered where you need boundaries and where you’re ready to grow.

That’s not starting over. That’s progress in disguise.

Maybe your body doesn’t move like it used to, or maybe your goals have shifted. That doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means you’ve evolved. Growth isn’t about getting back to who you were, it’s about becoming who you’re meant to be next.

So instead of chasing the version of yourself from five years ago, or even 5 days ago, honor the one standing in front of you right now. She’s wiser, stronger, and more capable than she realizes.

Start this year from a place of gratitude, not guilt. Build your goals around what brings peace, purpose, and possibility into your life. And when the excitement of the New Year fades and life feels ordinary again, remember this:

You don’t need to wait for a date on the calendar to create change.
You just need to keep showing up, one choice, one day, one movement at a time.

You are not a work in progress. You are a work in motion.

At DRM Wellness, we believe change doesn’t come from perfection. It comes from consistency, self-awareness, and confidence in your own abilities. Whether your goal is to move better, live independently, or build healthier habits, we’re here to help you do it with purpose and pride.

📞 Call us at (402) 940-8181
📧 Email us at [email protected]
💻 Learn more at www.DRMwellness.org

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